Sunday, March 1, 2015

Jaci Wightman - 19th Ward - Lessons from Rapunzel



If you’ve seen Tangled, I want you to think about Rapunzel in the beginning of the movie. She’s living in a tall tower deep in the middle of the woods. She has no contact at all with the outside world. Restless and frustrated, she sings, “When will my life begin?” Though it’s an adorable song in the movie, the question that’s always haunted me is this: if she’s so restless to get out and see the world, why doesn’t Rapunzel just leave the tower? Why doesn’t she just slide down her hair and go exploring? She’s not chained up. There aren’t any bars on the window. Why in the world does she stay? The answer is simple. An evil woman named Gothel has lied to Rapunzel—lied to her about who she is, about the outside world, and about the purpose of her life. And unfortunately, Rapunzel has believed every word. Because she believed, she chose to remain in the tower when she could have been living as a princess in her parents’ peaceful, happy kingdom.
Would you be surprised if I told you that the same thing has happened to each of us? An evil villain that the scriptures call “the father of lies” (2 Nephi 9:9) has told us all kinds of lies just like Gothel told Rapunzel. These include lies about ourselves, lies about the outside world, and lies about our purpose in life. Just like Rapunzel, we’ve believed him—and most of the time we don’t even know it. Because we’ve accepted Satan’s falsehoods as reality, we too remain stuck in our own little towers that limit us and keep us from becoming the holy women of God that we were meant to become.
If you’d have asked me many years ago if I believed any of Satan’s lies in my life, I would have adamantly told you no. I would have said I was a good, active Mormon who tried very hard to keep the commandments of God. But then I found a book by Virginia H. Pearce, former member of the Young Women General Presidency, called Through His Eyes: Rethinking What You Believe About Yourself. In it, Sister Pearce talks about our Belief Box. It’s a term she uses to represent the part of our mind that houses our thoughts and beliefs. She says that in this Box there are three compartments or types of beliefs: Truths with a capital T (eternal truths), truths with a lowercase t (bits of wisdom or good advice), and beliefs that are not true at all. This last category, she says, “is quite important, because not all beliefs are true. Some are actually lies.” She continues:
We are generally unaware that such ideas are in our Belief Box, because when we . . . look at them, they don’t make sense. In fact, they are laughable. Unfortunately, however, they can be very powerful in determining our emotions and behavior.
So how can we uncover the lies that live in our Belief Box? Here’s how Sister Pearce suggests we begin:
Listen to the chatter in your head. Don’t talk back or make judgments. Just listen. Slip into your ‘observing self’ as you become aware of strong emotions—positive or negative—and try to hear the chatter that created those emotions. Don’t do anything about it yet. Just watch and let it be. It’s pretty interesting. Much more entertaining than watching reality television!
I’ll admit that when I began to look inside myself and evaluate the beliefs living deep in my heart, to my horror I found that Satan’s sneaky little lies had wormed their way into almost every single area of my life. He’d lied to me about my personal worth, my body image, my marriage, and my parenting. He’d convinced me to turn to worldly things for happiness rather than God (even seemingly harmless things like chocolate, a chick flick, or a good book.) His lies were also fueling my terrible habit of people pleasing, and they’d even twisted the way I saw the gospel of Jesus Christ. And I’d believed that voice in my head without a second thought. You know the voice: “You’re worthless. You’re terrible mother. You’ll never change.” Or even: “You’re having a terrible day—you deserve to eat all the ice cream in the freezer.” I’d never realized that was the voice of the adversary lying to me. The realization rocked my entire world. Suddenly I desperately wanted to be free from the bondage of Satan’s lies and to clean out the corrupted Belief Box living inside my head.
Thankfully, Rapunzel’s story teaches us how we can turn our backs on the adversary and his awful lies. Her path to freedom began when Eugene came to the rescue and showed her the way out of the tower. In one of the final scenes, Eugene was even willing to give his life and cut off Rapunzel’s magical hair so she could be free from Gothel’s evil influence. We too have an amazing rescuer—a  Savior who really has given His life so we can be set free. I know that if we’ll draw near to Him, He can help us root out the lies we’ve been believing and replace those lies with His precious truth. I know this because He’s done that very thing for me personally. As I sought Him and His guidance and enabling power, my Savior taught me the truth—or “things as they really are” (Jacob 4:13). Through Him, I began to see myself, my marriage, my parenting, my happiness, and my entire life very differently. It was incredibly liberating to learn that I didn’t have to stay in the small little tower Satan had constructed for me. With my hand in my Savior’s, we left that awful place behind once and for all and began a journey to a brand new life filled with faith, hope, strength, and love. And He invites all of us to take that liberating journey. In fact, I’m firmly convinced that it’s the only way we’ll ever become holy and sanctified women of God.

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